Dear Adam Sandler, Please Stop Making Movies

Alright Adam, we get it man. We get that you have stopped caring, we get that you're worth $300 million, we get that you gave Kevin James life after King of Queens, and we get that you love Rob Schneider. The question is--when does it end? You have already tarnished your namesake enough, but obviously you don't care. Maybe that's a good thing. Hell, maybe that's even why you're rich.

I'm just personally sick of it. I can't be alone in thinking this, can I? I loved your early work man, you know, Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore? Then we have arguably your best acting perforamce in "Punch Drunk Love", and I thought you had incredible range. Then you just decided one day, screw it, time to shit on everything you have ever done.

Things just get worse before they get better. The schlock you've been tossing out for the last five years is unbelievable. I mean, just pure, unadulterated shit. Let me break it down for you...

We'll start in 2007 and work are way up.

1. I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry: Where do I begin? Let's see, ridiculous premise, not funny, Kevin James is fat and goofy so you chuckle a few times, and you grow very fond of Jessica Biel. Honestly, the gratuitous Biel ass shots almost saved this one for me Adam, almost.

2. You Don't Mess with the Zohan:Dude come on, seriously? You play an Israeli Special Agent who comes to New York only to realize that he wants to become a barber? Who...what...I just, I don't know what to say. Then he goes all bad ass when some bad dudes come to find him? And once again you dupe us with this hottie:

Emmanuelle Chriqui

3. Grown Ups: Why must you bring everyone down with you Adam? Chris Rock is easily one of my favorite comics, and you just cram him right into this hot mess. You've single-handedly supported Rob Schneider. The only reason he has a place to live and food to eat is because of you. And Kevin James? What do you see in this guy? Did he save your life or something and you feel like you owe him something? Yes he can be funny, but for the most part he's very annoying.


4. Just Go With It: I can't say anything bad about this. You used Brooklyn Decker and Jennifer Aniston to divert our attention away from the fact that the movie was awful. How could you stoop so low Adam?

You smug bastard...

5. Jack and Jill: I'm not even going to say anything, just watch.




Is this what it has come to Adam? Look at your body of work, and there are some classics in there somewhere, but you've obviously given up man. You just hand us these crap movies and expect us to pay? Well apparently it's working, congratulations. And what is with the shameless product placement in your movies? Adam, I don't even know who you are these days. I only have on plea dude, please, just please stop making movies. When does the embarrassment end? Have you no self respect? I give up man, but please consider putting an end to this madness, I simply can't take it any more.