WWE Smackdown Lowdown 3/02/2012

Friday Night Smackdown – March 2^nd, 2012

One month.  Thirty short days until the grandest stage of them all – Wrestlemania.  And our show opens with a recap of why Randy Orton is returning to Smackdown tonight.  Normally, I would say this short pre-credits segment should focus on Wrestlemania, but we’ve seen enough of Rock/Cena in the last week, so I’ll give this a pass.  A reworked intro to show some new faces during the opening credits.

The show opens proper with Sheamus out to an eruption of fan support.  A quick bout of storytime with Sheamus, discussing his journey from Rumble to Mania.  He then switches focus to Daniel Bryan and how he’s changed since capturing the World Heavyweight Title.

 Sheamus draws a quick comparison to himself after winning his first title and how he became what he hates most – A bully.  Much like what Sheamus needed, Bryan needs someone to set him straight, which Sheamus is more than happy to volunteer for.  And on that note…”EXCUSE ME!!”  Dolph and Vickie enter the scene, with Ziggler quick to point out that the world wants and deserves to see him at Wrestlemania, not the Great White.  We’re treated to some jokes about Vickie being a grandma and Teddy Long does what he does best – enter to music, make a match and skedaddle to the back.

Match 1 – Dolph Ziggler vs Sheamus

Strong open to the match from both men, with Sheamus running over Ziggler with shoulder tackles and Dolph answering with a well placed dropkick to reset.  After the reset, they look to do the same spot again, but this time Sheamus hugs the ropes, leaving Ziggler to whiff the dropkick.  Sheamus beats Ziggler in the corner and then transitions to 10 forearms while Ziggler is wrapped in the ropes.  Booker T, astute as always, informs us that this is a “beatdown”.  After another reset, Ziggler manages to drop Sheamus across the second rope with a neckbreaker to take control.  Back in the ring, a traditional neckbreaker for a close two count.  Standard repeating and jumping elbow drop from Ziggler for another near fall.  After fighting up from a chinlock, Sheamus begins to take control back, only for Ziggler to slap on his sleeper hold.  Sheamus fights out by jettisoning Ziggler from the ring. 

Climbing back in, Ziggler jumps at Sheamus from the top with a double axe handle, but ends up in the Irish Curse backbreaker.  Vickie sneaks Dolph’s foot onto the bottom rope to break the pin, which Booker T takes exception to.  Sheamus sets up for the Celtic Cross (Which is what they are calling his crucifix powerbomb now), but Ziggler counters into a great sunset flip.  Back to their feet, Sheamus hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and readies for the Brogue Kick.  Jack Swagger comes out to interfere and catches the kick from Sheamus, who turns around into a huge leg drop bulldog (Ziggler doesn’t really have a name for his version of the Fameasser yet).  Ziggler prepares for a Zig Zag but gets shrugged off and walks right into Sheamus’ version of the Air Raid Siren/Kryptonite Krunch, dubbed White Noise for the three count.

Winner: Sheamus via Pinfall.

Strong opener – always a good way to get the crowd truly interested.  A lengthy match, back and forth, and the babyface Sheamus overcomes interference twice to get a clean win over a strong foe.

We are then informed that John Laurinitis and Teddy Long will swap shows next week, apparently to see who the better GM is.  Effective decision, Board of Directors.

Back from commercial, we rewind to last week with Santino’s cobra spitting in Heath Slater’s face.  I’m going to say more with less here.  Most importantly, they have a match.  Next.

Match 2 – Santino Marella vs Heath Slater

Slater in the ring back from the video package and Santino makes his powerwalk entrance.  Start of the match gives us a split-dodge and some jabs from Santino.  Slater blocks the saluting headbutt for a reset.  Off the ropes, Slater lands a great facsimile of the Harlem Side Kick on Santino; Booker has nothing to say about this.  Way too many opportunities for good comments from him are missed and way too many obvious comments are given.  As Slater ascends the turnbuckle and subsequently gets crotched, a few rowdy fans started a weak “You can’t wrestle” chant in his direction.  While crotched, Slater eats a Cobra, tumbles off and gets pinned.

Winner: Santino Marella via pinfall

As Santino trombones around the ring, which the crowd loves, Michael Cole talks about how ridiculous the Cobra is and how it’s even worse than the Spinaroonie, which of course draws the ire of Booker T.  On another note, the “You can’t wrestle” chant at Slater is wholly unwarranted.  He’s no fan favorite, he’s no megastar, but Slater wrestles incredibly well and sells like a champ.  “You can’t tan” would be a bit more accurate.

A quick rewind to the most recent HHH/Undertaker Wrestlemania 27 recap.  Jim Ross’ voice over this type of video truly makes it better, bigger, stronger.  There just isn’t anyone who can make you believe in what you’re watching like good old JR.  HBK will be on RAW again; important, as he will definitely play into the Wrestlemania 28 rematch and needs to be established with a good reason to do so.

Eve is primping in the back, staring at herself in a mirror.  Natalya (previously a cruel heel) tells Eve that she doesn’t at all approve of Eve’s treatment and use of Zack Ryder.  Eve tells Nattie that Ryder is “Sweet and genuine, but he stinks.” Natalya, on cue, farts and tells Eve “No, THAT stinks.”  So in one fell swoop, we find out that Ryder’s choice of Axe spray is less than stellar and that Natalya has now embraced her IBS, which is then discussed by the commentators.  Super duper use of a great female wrestler, guys.

Match 3 – Natalya vs Eve Torres

Natalya is in the ring, Eve gets an intro, to huge boos and “Hoeski” chants.  We wrestling fans love chanting things.  Natalya with a quick headlock and Eve with an (unexpected) jiu-jitsu style escape.  To be fair, she does some Gracie training, but we haven’t really seen it in the ring until now.  A quick exchange leads to dueling kip-ups.  Eve breaks out another new hold for this match: A straight-jacket clutch (You WWF No Mercy fans may know this by the name “Goku-Raku Stretch”).  Natalya counters for a roll, Eve counters this by rolling through and picks up a three count.

Winner: Eve Torres via pinfall

Not much to note here, really: The commentators ignored the action of a divas match as usual (Three men on the headsets, not one can point out a new move for a popular diva??) and Natalya extended her hand for a shake early in the match, which Eve ignored.  So Eve is solidly heel, Natalya is moving back in the direction of a face, but with a semi-comedy gimmick.  We’d all much rather see her fart weekly, rather than seeing Sharpshooters.  WWE knows their fan base so, so well.

Our next segment has Cody Rhodes come out to the ring, which is always a treat.  He prepares to show more embarrassing Big Show moments at Wrestlemania, but Show comes out to interrupt.  Rhodes runs away through the crowd and Teddy Long comes out to make Rhodes vs Show for the Intercontinental title official for ‘Mania.  Big Show was the World Champion just months ago.  Now he’s thrilled for an IC title shot.  Should be happiest about getting his hands on Rhodes.  Can’t imagine Show goes over and wins this title from what has become a young star, so interesting to see how this plays out.  Also, Show is facing Henry right now

Match 4 – Mark Henry vs Big Show

Early in the match, Show takes a backwards flip over the top rope courtesy of a Mark Henry lariat.  Not sure I’ve ever seen that before.  After Show’s head is rammed into an exposed turnbuckle, we cut to commercial.  Back from break, Henry is still in control and Rhodes is on commentary.  Outside, Mark Henry throws the ring steps at Big Show’s head, as he is leaning on the ringpost.  Show dodges, but regardless of hitting him or not, how is that NOT a disqualification, really?  Back in the ring, Henry lands a Vader Bomb on the Big Show for two.  Show fights back with a big boot and spear, but walks into the World’s Strongest Slam for a very close two count.  Mark Henry gets up and walks into a desperation WMB from Big Show for the three count.

Winner: Big Show via pinfall

Some stare downs, some trash talk.  All in all, meant to show that Big Show is back to being a menacing force and Rhodes need fear.

Drew McIntyre is in the back and Long informs him that this is his last chance.  His real last chance.

A Raw recap of Orton ‘suffering a concussion’ from a Bryan belt shot to the head.  Orton tells us he’s angry and vengeful; big change of pace.  Orton feels Bryan cost him a chance to be the champion at Wrestlemania and wants to collect on a debt.

Match 5 – Drew McIntyre vs Justin Gabriel

Drew in the ring, Justin gets an entrance.  Too many of these tonight; the entrance is a big part of a wrestler’s character.  Drew starts out aggressive with clotheslines and a big boot, followed by repeated cover attempts.  Shows us that he wants to win above all else.  He’s also very careful about 5 counts in the ropes and turnbuckles, which he shows by begging off with the ref; a nice touch.  Gabriel hits a big headscissors-to-DDT transition and lands the 450 for a pin, after essentially no other offense.

Winner: Justin Gabriel via pinfall

Teddy Long pops up on the Titantron to send Drew packing, for real this time.  We can only imagine that when Laurinitis runs Smackdown next week, he’ll rehire Drew and pull him into his fold.

A trailer for Edge in “Bending the Rules”. Usually I wouldn’t care about a WWE commercial for a WWE film in a WWE show, but Edge is so damn smarmy that he actually might pull this role off well.

Raw Rebound for the fourth “rewind” of any sort on this show, five if you count the pre-credits opening video.  Focus of this one: Cena’s claim of “Dwayne” vs “Rock” as two different people.  I’d much rather see a fun match in all this recap time with the likes of Tyson Kidd or Trent Barreta, but I seem to be in the minority on that.

We cut to Daniel Bryan in the back, saying the World Heavyweight Title hasn’t changed him at all.  He gets a Mick Foley-style cheap pop for saying he’s from Washington, only to take the heel route to cheap heat, saying he’s glad he left as soon as he could.  He runs down his “role model” shtick, which is serving him incredibly well right now, but also shows a fire and intensity.  This is important, as up until now, he’s absolutely been showcased as a wuss, a cheater and not ‘worthy’ of the title.  As he finishes, Randy Orton’s music hits and it’s time for the main event of the night.

Match 6 – Randy Orton vs Daniel Bryan (World Heavyweight Champion), non title

First and foremost, I want to give big credit to the five guys on the hard camera side with “YES!” signs.  They managed a retweet from Bryan for that, and in modern WWE, that’s huge.  I’m sure they trended.

Orton, as expected, is very aggressive to start.  After a tumble outside, Orton stomps Bryan’s head on the steel steps, much to the chagrin of AJ.  Back inside, Bryan blocks a superplex attempt and follows with his big dropkick in the corner.  He follows with a dropkick to the arm and a single arm DDT; the previous segment’s intensity shows through with his focus on a single body part.  Orton begins to make his comeback but gets cut off.  Bryan tries to follow with a dive from the top, but eats a dropkick on the way down.  Orton finally makes his usual comeback, lands the second rope spike DDT and coils for the RKO.  Bryan counters twice, but finds himself set up for the spike DDT on the outside.  Then the arena goes dark and Kane’s pyro and music hit.  To finish the match, Orton goes after Kane and Bryan slips in to beat the count out.

Winner: Daniel Bryan via countout (Not announced)

Kane and Orton fight, Kane puts Randy’s bad arm into the ringpost and lands a chokeslam.  At one point, Bryan bailed from the ring and left poor little AJ (Who, for some reason, Booker T was absolutely brutal to on the microphone tonight) alone with Kane, but he ended up distracted by Orton, leading to the aforementioned chokeslam.  Kane gets on the mat and welcomes Randy back on the microphone.  Why?  Who knows.  We’ll see in a couple weeks as it develops.  The logic is likely nothing more or less than “Orton needs an opponent leading to Wrestlemania and Cena already beat the ash off of Kane”.

To end the show, Laurinitis and Otunga are shown in the back, impressed by Kane.  Laurinitis then says he’s going to book Kane vs Aksana next week.  That’s pretty harsh, Mr. Excitement.

Things continue to build for ‘Mania : Our world heavyweight champion continues to wrestle well but win by nefarious means, if at all.  Big Show, a former multi time world champion, is excited for an Intercontinental title shot.   Kane is mad at Randy Orton for existing…or something.  He’ll probably say how happy he is that Orton embraces hi s hate more than John Cena.  Eve is a heel.  At least Sheamus is doing what makes sense: A strong, consistent string of wins, by defeating his opponent in the ring.  The last few sentences may have sounded unnecessarily negative, but I am still more than excited to continue down the Road to Wrestlemania to see what unfolds.