WWE Raw Wrapup 3/19/2012

Monday Night Raw – March 19^th, 2012

The final stretch to Wrestlemania approaches:  13 short days.  Only three more shows (at least what gets shown on television) until the biggest one of the year.  A graphic reminding us that Shawn Michaels, Triple H and Undertaker will be face-to-face is shown and our WWE champion enters to start the show off strong.

CM Punk is formally announced and receives the now-expected big ovation.  A quick recap of Jericho explaining to Punk that alcoholism is in his blood from the announcers and Punk informs us that Jericho is not in the building tonight.  Punk says this shows the kind of man Jericho is.  Punk reflects on talking about his father and waits out a “CM PUNK” chant.  Punk has come to terms with his father and has accepted what he was, but it wasn’t at all Jericho’s place to bring it to the public light.  Alcoholism, as a disease, touches everyone.  Punk explains that Jericho has let loose a monster inside Punk, and now that monster is Jericho’s problem.  Punk says that our past nightmares do not cloud our future dreams.  Punk’s dad overcame alcoholism; he bested that obstacle.  Now, Jericho is Punk’s obstacle.  Punk won’t go over, around or under him; he’s going to go right through him.  Jericho appears on the Titantron, live via satellite, and apologizes for being out of line about Punk’s father.  He vows he won’t do it again.  He will, however, point out that Punk’s sister has a substance abuse problem.  He says this is all in Punk’s blood and that he will drive Punk to drink.  Punk might overcome drinking and alcoholism, but he can’t overcome Jericho defeating him at ‘Mania.  Punk yells at Jericho and the censors hit the dump button – Punk yelled to Jericho that the comment was “bullshit”, and that’s what he’s going to beat out of him at Wrestlemania.

Excellent energy to open the show and the crowd was wholeheartedly invested – booing the alcoholism, cheering Punk’s father overcoming and being disgusted with Jericho’s accusations at Punk’s sister.  This promo has me sold on this being a personal issue now, whereas in previous weeks I wasn’t entirely into it.

Back from a commercial break, Kane is mid-ring and mid-entrance, setting off his pyro.

Match 1 – Kane vs Big Show

As Big Show hits the ring, Cody Rhodes’ music immediately hits.  A goofy video of the Big Show Wrestlemania moments from the last few weeks plays as a montage.  Back in the ring, Show and Kane lock up and Show opens with body blows in the corner.  Kane throws a big boot to the head and both men grab each other for a chokeslam, resulting in them hitting the ropes and Show landing a spear.  Big Show gets on the middle rope and Cody hops on the apron, but gets shoved off.  This is enough distraction for Kane to grab Show by the neck and chokeslam him off the middle rope for the win.

Winner: Kane via pinfall

Cody quickly enters the ring and delivers the Beautiful Disaster kick to the head and then handcuffs big show in the ropes.  Cody then dons a pair of boxing gloves and absolutely lights up the Big Show, finishing with a few stomps for good measure.  When the refs break out the bolt cutters to release Show, Cody bails as Show screams after him “RUN!”.  As Show stands, he’s on spaghetti legs, selling the results of the onslaught.  Not only does Cody cost Show a quick match, he beats the hell out of him.  By the laws of professional wrestling, along with the promos Cody has run, sets him up for a loss at ‘Mania.  I said last week that I don’t see Show holding the Intercontinental Title in 2012, and I stand by that.  Please surprise me, WWE.

Match 2 – David Otunga vs Santino Marella (United States Champion), non title match

Otunga for some reason does a facsimile of Wade Barrett’s jacket-tossing entrance, but manages to get it caught around both feet up to the calves as he poses.  Please leave that spot to the professionals.  Both men are out with their respective GM’s.  Santino doesn’t take his usual lap around the ring, and heads right in – he must mean business tonight.  Or not, as Santino has painted abs on himself so he can have a pose down with Otunga.  Santino gets a charliehorse on the third pose and Otunga attacks.  Santino quickly comes back with jabs, a split dodge, a hip toss and the jumping headbutt.  The cobra comes out, but Lauranaitis slides his blackberry into the ring, which Santino lays boots to.  Santino turns around into The Verdict and eats a loss 2 weeks out from ‘Mania

Winner: David Otunga via pinfall

Long checks on Santino and Ace jaws at him, resulting in Teddy paintbrushing him and high tailing it up the ramp with Santino.  Then Teddy dances.  Not quite sure what he’s celebrating – his captain losing, or him being a sissy.  This entire thing has zero focus on the wrestlers involved, and that’s really not good for anybody, considering Dolph Ziggler is involved, who should by all rights be a top star this year and the US champion.

Quick rewind to HHH proposing Hell in a Cell at ‘Mania and a reminder that all three men will be in the ring 

together tonight.

A spot for Lord Tensai plays – he is coming soon.  As it turns out, this is going to be A-Train/Giant Bernard, who has had an excellent run in NJPW and is apparently being repackaged here.  He’s a very good big man, so welcome back.

The Rock is shown on the Titantron in front of the Rocky Balboa statue, talking about Philly being the city of ass-kickers.  He shows a picture of himself at 12 in front of the statue and self-deprecates.  He then begins to talk about the biggest stars of Wrestlemania – Hogan at WMI, Ultimate Warrior at WM6, even himself and Stone Cold Steve Austin, a match he lost.  Rock did eventually defeat Austin.  He defeated Hogan.  Now all that’s left is Cena.  If this promo accomplishes nothing else, this is a conscious effort to escalate Cena in the fan’s minds.  Rock is going to go to Pat’s (cheap pop!), get a big cheesesteak and stick it up Cena’s ass, then apparently the greats of Wrestlemania (unnamed but distinguished with a “Bang Bang!”, a “Wooooooooo!” and a “Ohhhhhh yeah, dig it!”) will thank Rock for doing this.  These are the parts of Rock’s promos that lose my attention.  That said, this was the best promo from Rock in this ‘back for Wrestlemania’ series, so all negativity aside, thumbs up from me.

Match 3 – Zack Ryder vs Daniel Bryan (World Heavyweight Champion) w/ AJ, non title match

AJ, for all her disappointed faces on Smackdown, is back to all smiles and lovey-dovey eyes for Bryan.  A clip of Ryder lobbying to join Team Teddy is shown.  Also, hell of a recovery from being in three different back braces in the last month or so, Zack.  Bryan requests (demands) a kiss for good luck and AJ obliges.  Quick chain wrestling, leading to Ryder running Bryan over, but soon after taking a knee to the gut, a kick to the back and a knee drop to the face.  Bryan stretches Ryder in the ropes, then puts pressure on his throat across the bottom rope.  Ryder fights out of the following headlock and puts Bryan in the corner for the Broski Boot.  Zack readies for the Rough Ryder, but Bryan counters, pancaking Zack down and immediately applying the Labell Lock for the win.

Winner: Daniel Bryan (World Heavyweight Champion) via submission

Bryan goes into his usual “YES!” celebration to finish the segment.  Ryder looks good for a guy who was crippled a couple of weeks ago.  The little things, like stretching Ryder the way he did, harkens back to the Daniel Bryan of old (Read: Bryan Danielson) and shows this is welcome.  If he’s going to embrace the heel run, a bit of a vicious streak is excellent.

The commentators make quick mention of Cena being in a car accident earlier in the day, selling that he might be hiding pain/aches/etc.  The fact that story broke on WWE.com raises an eyebrow, but nothing seems to be wrong with Cena.

Match 4 – John Cena vs Mark Henry

As the Philadelphia crowd usually does, Cena is met with a chorus of boos.  Cena opens by tying up with Henry, who tosses him backwards.  Cena tries a headlock, with the same result.  Henry runs Cena over with a shoulder block and lays into him in the corner.  Henry tosses Cena outside and then into the barrier.  Cena tries to roll into the ring as we go to break, but Henry stops him.  Coming back, Cena is fighting out of a hold, but eats a clothesline from Henry.  Henry lands a splash for a two count.  Henry hits a body shot in one corner and then an avalanche in the opposite one.  Henry misses the next attempt and Cena drops him with a belly-to-back suplex, followed by the Five Knuckle Shuffle.  Cena can’t quite get Henry up for the AA and tries a running cross body, but gets caught.  Henry goes for the World’s Strongest Slam, but Cena goes up and over, landing behind and lifts Henry for the Attitude Adjustment, landing it for the three.

Winner: John Cena via pinfall

Rock’s music immediately hits, he paces the stage and hits the ring, delivering Rock Bottom to Mark Henry, then leaving.  This is the big message he had in store for Cena?  I can beat up a guy you just beat up?  Cena played a good babyface in peril in this match, which is a nice change of pace from the usual “Superman” routine.  The AA bump that Henry took looked painful – Cena didn’t quite get the arm wrapped around his head, so he took it pretty high on the back.

A recap of HBK/HHH from two weeks ago plays and we’re again reminded they and Undertaker are here tonight.

A clip from “Extra” runs, which breaks down to Eve and Beth Phoenix being jealous that Maria Menounos is interviewing Kelly Kelly.  It gets physical and a tag match at Wrestlemania is set.  Last time Maria was in the ring, she pinned Beth; hopefully this year is her comeuppance, as the Divas division could really stand for their champion to NOT be beaten by a non-wrestler celebrity.

Back in the ring, Miz is already out to speak his mind – He wants to be at Wrestlemania.  He doesn’t want to headline 27 and no-show 28.  He refuses to drop off that far.  He has issued an open challenge, to show Johnny that he’s Wrestlemania material.

Match 5 – The Miz vs Sheamus

Sheamus gets to the ring faster than I’ve ever seen him move, all smiles.  Miz opens with blows to the head and Sheamus begs for more.  Miz kicks at Sheamus’ leg, going for his signature DDT, but Sheamus stands up out of it, lifts Miz in front of him, then throws him up over his head onto his shoulders for a rolling fireman’s carry.  Miz makes a short come back with his backbreaker/neckbreaker combo and then puts pressure on Sheamus in the ropes, followed by a boot to the face.  Miz applies a chinlock, which of course affords Sheamus the opening to power out.  Sheamus beats Miz in the corner and delivers a powerslam.  Sheamus readies and calls for the Brough Kick, which Miz dodges, only to turn around into another one for the loss.

Winner: Sheamus via pinfall

So far tonight, Ryder has lobbied to join Team Teddy, been booked in a match and lost, which Miz has repeated.  Hopefully something comes of it for one of them, otherwise they got beat up for no reason.

A short video recaps Jericho’s accusations of Punk’s sister from earlier tonight and we are told that Randy Orton will be out next.

Josh Matthews introduces Randy Orton, who comes out onto the stage for a quick interview.  When asked how he will defeat a monster, he responds with “How will the monster beat me?”  Well that wasn’t informative, Randy.  In the span of about 90 seconds, Orton basically lays out that he’ll be able to defeat Kane because his name is Randy Orton.  Almost too basic of a promo for someone who’s been around as long as Orton.

Vickie Guerrero is out to announce the two newest members of Team Johnny, who just so happen to have a tag match next:  Jack Swagger and Dolph Ziggler

Match 6 – Jack Swagger and Dolph Ziggler vs Kofi Kingston and R-Truth

A commercial plays, and back from break, Aksana and Vickie are being separated by their respective teams (Kofi/Truth’ entrances were not shown on TV).  Kofi starts the match against Swagger, laying into him with kicks.  Kofi stops an attempted double team and lands a crossbody.  Ziggler lands a blow and Swagger lands a swaggerbomb.  Kofi is hammered in the corner and Ziggler tags in.  Kofi counters an attempted neckbreaker into a backslide, but Ziggler lands a dropkick to the face for two.  Swagger tags in and lands elbows into the ribs of Kofi, then does pushups on him.  The show-off is rubbing off on his partner.  Kofi fights out of a surfboard stretch and dives for a tag to R-Truth, but Swagger counters him.  Kofi turns this into a big elevated DDT and both teams make the tag.  Truth is all over Ziggler and lands the Lie Detector, followed by his sitout gourdbuster.  Swagger breaks up a pin attempt after the flurry.  Ziggler dodges an Axe Kick from Truth then lands a kick to the knee and his version of the Fameasser (Ziggler really needs a name for this, as the commentators never know what to call it).  Truth gets his foot on the ropes, but Vickie knocks it off, resulting in a pin.

Winners:  Jack Swagger and Dolph Ziggler via (admittedly dirty) pinfall

Aksana does not take kindly to this result and gets in Vickie’s face, resulting in a cat fight that Joey Styles must have been dying to call.  So at this point, there’s more focus on Aksana/Vickie and the GM’s themselves than the multiple talented guys in this 12 man tag match.  That’s irksome.

A clip from a house show at Madison Square Garden plays, showing HHH back in the ring, readying the Pedigree on Ziggler, but opting to lift him up for a Tombstone and pin him Undertaker-style.  Good message to Taker and a good call to show it on Raw, but I feel this would be way more impactful if we didn’t see HHH Tombstone Undertaker himself last year for the closest two count I’ve ever seen.

Following the clip, we’re greeted with Shawn Michaels making his full entrance.  Shawn is happy to report that even though he’s only the special referee, everyone is talking about him.  He holds the end of an era in the palm of his hand.  He asks rhetorically “Can I be impartial?” and is answered with the gong of the Undertaker’s entrance.  ‘Taker reiterates that the result of this match must remain “pure” which is ‘Taker code for “no bullshit”.  Triple H approaches the ring, making his full water bottle entrance.  HHH tells Undertaker not to worry about Shawn; it’s not about him.  It’s about HHH and ‘Taker.  Triple H explains that of the 24 Hell in a Cell matches in WWE history, 19 of them have involved Hunter and/or Undertaker.  The Cell is where HHH learned, where he thrives, where he excels.  Undertaker asks if Hunter will put it all on the line – family, career, life?  Triple H is more than happy to agree.   Before leaving the ring, Undertaker asks Triple H if he remembers a couple weeks ago when he proposed the question of whether Shawn Michaels was the better of the two men.  “He is”.  Cheap shot from Undertaker, drawing ire from Triple H and a top-notch shit eating grin from HBK.

Two weeks out from the show, this is a bit of a weak Raw.  The first hour’s wrestling action was entirely minimal.  Punk and Jericho’s promo absolutely helped to push their match forward to the forefront.  Multiple segments are dedicated to the General Managers on a weekly basis, with the focus on them and their valets, but barely on the wrestlers involved.  Cena/Rock was given a slightly different focus: Rock “needing” to beat Cena, when the verbiage was the opposite until recently.  Sheamus is still looking incredibly strong heading into Wrestlemania and they haven’t taken any silly or unnecessary missteps with his run to the title match.  Egos abound in the HHH/Taker match, which is expected and not at all unwelcome.

Coming up soon, The Geek Asylum will have some Wrestlemania predictions.  We welcome your contributions in the comments!